Nilanjana Rai Reward Points : 27800 Member Since : Saturday, March 14, 2009
Indian society has for ages witnessed successful joint families. However with time due to several reasons, the joint family system gave way to nuclear families. But I feel that joint families had their own advantages. A big family definitely requires adjustments and one may not have his/her desired share of privacy but the joy of sharing sorrows, joys and having fun is simply inimitable. Joint families are perfect for kids. In an age where families are opting for single issues they will have cousins to play with grandmothers to narrate tales learn to be obedient and responsible, etc. Yet our own craving for space, privacy, etc compels us to break away and form nuclear families. But is it really that difficult to adjust in joint families?
Posted On : 3/30/2009 2:54:10 AM
Anju Malhotra Reward Points : 61200 Member Since : Tuesday, March 31, 2009
No Nilanjana, it is not difficult to adjust in joint families if the adjustment is done on either side. Wherever a group of people reside, some collision is bound to happen, but the elders and youngsters both should deal the matter practically and solve it without making that an issue. Understanding and affection are the essentials of keeping a joint family intact. In fact I feel, in today s expensive world, the concept of joint family is quiet cost effective and worthwhile. What do u all think?
Posted On : 4/2/2009 7:31:15 AM
Maniam PS [Guru] Reward Points : 142500 Member Since : Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Joint Family is an extended family arrangement prevalent among Hindus of the Indian subcontinent, consisting of many generations living under the same roof. All the male members are blood relatives and all the women are either mothers, wives, unmarried daughters, or widowed relatives, all bound by the common sapinda relationship. An undivided family, which is the normal condition of a Hindu society, is ordinarily joint not only in whatever relates to their commensality and their religious duties and observance are regulated by the task of regulation. The joint family status being the result of birth, possession of joint cord that knits the members of the family together is not property but the relationship. The family is headed by a patriarch, usually the oldest male, who makes decisions on economic and social matters on behalf of the entire family. The patriarch s wife generally exerts control over the kitchen, child rearing and minor religious practices. All money goes to the common pool and all property is held jointly. A daughter cannot remain the member of her father s family after her marriage and the sisters, though they were once entitled to a share in the property, would lose their right and would be entitled to only maintenance until their marriage and their marriage expenses. A joint family may consist of a single male member and widows of the deceased male members and the property of the family does not cease to belong to the joint family merely because the family is represented by a single coparcener who possesses rights which an absolute owner of the property may possess. There are several schools of Hindu Law, such Mitakshara, the Dayabhaga, the Murumakkattayam, the Aliyasanthana etc. Broadly, Mitakshara and Dayabhaga systems of laws are very common. Family ties are given more importance than marital ties. The arrangement provides a kind of social security in a familial atmosphere. Due to the development of Indian Legal System, of late, the female members are also given the right of share to the property in the HUF. In CIT vs Veerappa Chettiar, 76 ITR 467 SC , Supreme Court had occasion to decide on an issue whether after the death of all the male members in a HUF, the HUF would still exist.
The beauty about the Indian culture lies in its age-long prevailing tradition of the joint family system. It s a system under which even extended members of a family like one s parents, children, the children s spouses and their offspring, etc. live together. The elder-most, usually the male member is the head in the joint Indian family system who makes all important decisions and rules, whereas other family members abide by it dutifully with full respect. A major factor that keeps all members, big and small, united in love and peace in a joint family system in India is the importance attached to protocol. This feature is very unique to Indian families and very special. Manners like respecting elders, touching their feet as a sign of respect, speaking in a dignified manner, taking elders advice prior taking important decisions, etc. is something that Indian parents take care to inculcate in their kids from very beginning. The head of the family responds by caring and treating each member of the family the same.
Posted On : 4/6/2009 11:26:09 PM
Ratri Basak Reward Points : 37600 Member Since : Thursday, December 13, 2007
The intention behind the formation of any social unit will fail to serve its purpose if discipline is lacking and the same applies to the joint family system as well. Due to this reason, discipline is another factor given utmost importance in the joint family system in India. As a rule, it s the say of the family head that prevails upon others. Incase of any disagreement, the matter is diligently sorted out by taking suggestions from other adult members. One usually also has to follow fixed timings for returning home, eating, etc. The reason why Indians are proving to emerge as a prosperous lot globally, many researches claim, is because of the significance they attach to the joint family system. All working cohesively to solve a problem faced by any one or more members of the joint family, is what works magic in keeping one tension-free, happy and contended even in today s highly competitive environment. An Indian may be a top corporate honcho or a great sportsperson or a movie actor and so on in a particular professional field, but all these accomplishments relegate to the backseat when at home.
Yes,Ratri ji u ar absolutely right joint family system is better to live happy in life bcoz in joint families all the decisions nd rules ar decided by the elders and all the family members obey to all these abiding respectively,we nt need to wry about anything if one or more members faces any type of problem then it solves out by elders after all only the persons they ar without courage to settle ownself in joint family thinks abt nuclear family..................................
Posted On : 9/22/2009 12:25:07 AM
Anwer Arain Reward Points : 500 Member Since : Sunday, December 13, 2009
But how the conflict be managed when the mother-in-law does not accept his son s wife and is not agreeable to give her due respect as amember of family.And when all the home work load is laden upon Bahoo and Husband s sister do not share the house jobs. Most importantly the Husband is so obedient that his mothers s right or wrong word is final and does not have the courage to balance rights of mother and his wife. I need yur expert advice because such problems are being faced by Bahus widely,now a days when literate girls become Bahoos and instead playing her role as cow evaluate matters upon the basis of justice and logic and have the urge that she be respeted as afamily member like NUNDS husband s sister.
Posted On : 12/13/2009 5:07:35 PM
Amreeta DG Reward Points : 1900 Member Since : Friday, September 18, 2009
Posted By : Anwer Arain Posted On : 12/13/2009 5:07:35 PM Go
But how the conflict be managed when the mother-in-law does not accept his son s wife and is not agr..
Well Mr. Anwer, it is always better to maintain distance and good relations rather than stay in the same house and bicker day in and day out. There are certain individual cases where adjusting becomes absolutely impossible. But if we are looking at the matter in a general way then there is no harm in adjusting a little with family members. Joint family, for me, is always preferable than a nuclear one.